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So,
here's what a woman watching or looking at typical mainstream porn
might be thinking:
"Oooh. Sex... Oooh, it's making me
horny. But wait..."
"Those fake tits look dumb. They're like balloons on her
skinny chest. And she's wearing too much makeup. Ew, now it's all
smeared on his dick..."
"Man, Ron Jeremy is ugly, how the hell did he get so popular?
The other guys aren't much better, I wish they were better
looking..."
"As if she'd just fuck the pizza guy, look at him, he's about
15!"
"Why is she still wearing her high heels? How the hell did
she get naked without taking her shoes off??
"Anal sex? Already? Hey, slow down you prick. Ow."
"Why is that woman looking at me and not the guy she's
fucking? Hey... babe... look at him... go on... LOOK AT HIM!! Oh
for Christ's sake, now she's staring at the wall. She's probably
thinking about her next appointment at the STD clinic."
"Those moans are so fake! Just shut up and enjoy it, will
you? No, stop making all those stupid kitten noises, they sound
really dumb. Either go with a proper low moan or keep quiet."
"Hah, she's supposed to be having an orgasm and he hasn't
even touched her clit! Hang on... maybe I'm the only one who can't
come with my vagina. What's wrong with me?"
"Well, that was ridiculously quick. But why is she having an
orgasm when there's nothing actually touching her at all? Do other
women really scream that much when they come?"
"Why does the guy get 40 minutes worth of blowjob but he
doesn't reciprocate? Come on, give her a lick! Wimp!"
"Why can't they kiss each other properly instead of
tongue-jousting? It's not hard... Put. Your. Lips. Together. Close
your eyes. No, put your tongue away!! Oh God, it's hopeless."
"Look at the nails on those lesbians. That's gonna cause some
serious internal damage. And she'll need a manicure after
this."
"Why, oh fucking why, does he have to pull out and come all
over her face and hair and stomach? What possible good has that
done either of them? If they're relying on the rhythm method, I
don't think they'll last long as porn stars."
"Why can't we see the man's face when he comes?"
"Why does she look happy that she's got cum in her eye?
That's gotta hurt! Ooh, now it's all through her mascara."
"Hey, he came but she didn't... why isn't he sticking around
to finish her off? Bastard."
©
Grandma Scrotum 2004 |
What
Porn Is Available for Women?
For
The Girls - a women's magazine with porn added. Lots
of naked men and couples photos and movies, but also articles,
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Pure Cunnilingus
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Couples
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Female Fantasies
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Full
premium porn for women list |